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March 23, 2005
The Weirdest Movie Roundup Ever
(Disclaimer: the following contains the most forced segue in BunkoSquad history)
The gravity post below (which was fake) was inspired in no small part by this fiasco - several IMAX theaters in the (wait for it) South aren't going to be showing a new film about volcanoes because it mentions evolution. Keep in mind some of these IMAXes are attached to science museums. I guess science museums in the South are probably rightfully fearful about torch-wielding mobs.
But do you know who oughtta be concerned about torch-wielding mobs? Any theater in New England that shows Fever Pitch.
Never in my life did I think that a movie featuring
- Jimmy Fallon (who I think is in over his head as an actor, but overall pretty cool and funny)
- Drew Barrymore (upon whom I've had a mad crush on for like 15 years), and
- The Red Sox
would make me want to throw up repeatedly, but they've pulled it off. Why? Because 30 seconds after Foulke threw Mientkiewicz the ball, launching the Official Greatest Moment of My Life, Fox treated us to the sight of Drew and Jimmy dancing around the St. Louis infield. In the words of Sheila Broslovski...wha wha WHAT?!?
Because here's the deal. We, as Red Sox fans, wanted to see the Red Sox celebrating. We wanted to see Johnny Damon and Johnny Pesky and Johnny Henry. And we wanted to see the Idiots in the customary pigpile and racing towards the champagne.
We didn't want to see Jimmy Fallon; he's from New York and not even remotely a real Red Sox fan. And we (how do I say this without potentially souring the Next Offical Greatest Moment of My Life) didn't...(I'm sorry)...need to...(I'll make it up to you)...see...(I swear)...Drew, who -- let's be honest -- probably didn't fully appreciate the gravitas of the moment. (Let me make it up to you, OK?)
So I won't be seeing this movie. This guy is calling for a universal boycott. Good for him. And Bill Simmons' thoughts are pretty close to my own.
Of course, if Drew shows up and offers to escort me to the film, my principles will last about as long as an evolution pamphlet at a creationist science museum. But until then, I'm taking my $9.50 elsewhere. And shame on any movie theater around here that screens it.
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Comments
I agree. It was annoying seeing them on the field. Well, annoying only for just a fleeting second, given what had just transpired ... for the first time in 86 years!
Nice segue, by the way.
Posted by: Vin | March 24, 2005 11:19 AM
Another reason why listening to Joe & Jerry on the radio beats watching TV.
Uh, though now that I think of it, we had the TV on (with the sound off). Maybe we were too busy jumping up and down on kitchen chairs to, uh . . . the whole thing is kind of a blur . . .
Posted by: Secret Agent Cathy | March 26, 2005 08:05 PM
