All Entries Related to "Boston Red Sox"
July 29, 2008
Dear Fenway Fans
Anybody who was doing the Wave last night in the eighth inning when the Sox were down by three, with two on and threatening for more, do everyone a favor. Give your tickets to someone who actually wants to be at a baseball game. Then you can go to the beach and frolic around all you want, or better yet, shoot yourself. I know you were still on your "Sweet Caroline" high, but seriously. Go to Dick's Last Resort or something and stop embarassing me.
UPDATE: I didn't watch the game last night (Lackey's near no-hitter) so I can't confirm this, but if they indeed played "Sweet Caroline" last night and people were indeed singing about how they feel "so good! so good! so good!" while the Red Sox were being no-hit, well. These people need to die in a fire. The sooner the better.
Posted by Michael at 08:55 AM | Comments (4)
June 30, 2008
This Gets Me Mad
People are debating whether or not Curt Schilling belongs in the Hall of Fame.
When, exactly, did the Hall of Fame become the Hall of Math? A common argument against Schilling is that Bert Blyleven had better numbers, or Tommy John had a slightly lower [(walks/inning * park-adjusted ERA)/(K/balk ratio in day games * the square root of switch-hitting opponents' batting average on artificial turf)] so there's no way Schilling should get in until they do.
Hogwash. Schilling was a very good regular season pitcher and a transcendent pitcher when the stakes were the highest. Maybe (well...definitely) I'm biased, but the guy helped carry Arizona to a championship, and he carried the Sox to a World Series win when his foot was attached by rubber bands and Popsicle sticks.
The Hall of Fame test, which I always thought and Bill Simmons elucidated nicely, is, will you ever tell your grandkids that you watched someone play. People will be talking about Schill for decades to come. Did anyone ever buy a ticket to a Twins game because Blyleven was pitching?
It amazes me how many Hall of Fame voters base their votes on numbers and numbers alone. If that's what gets you into the Hall, why use voters at all? Why not just let a computer decide?
Posted by Michael at 09:26 AM | Comments (4)
March 12, 2008
Oh, The Indignity
Mike Greenwell, my favorite Red Sox player of the 20th Century, and the 1988 AL MVP in Exile, was hassled by a security guard when he went to visit the Sox at spring training.
The Gator emphatically stated that he never did steroids. Which, honestly, was a possibility that never crossed my mind. No, his current physique appears a testament not to illegal drugs, but to the vast variety of chain restaurants and buffets in the greater Fort Myers/Cape Coral area. Good for you, Greenie.
Posted by Michael at 09:21 AM | Comments (0)
May 30, 2007
A Developing Situation
Award-winning sportswriter Dan Shaughnessy goes BEYOND THE HEADLINES today. Using his unmatched skill at putting two and two together, he discovers something you may not be aware of - the Red Sox are playing really well right now. That's the kind of analysis that sails right over the heads of laymen and bloggers.
Incidentally, if Fenway isn't ringing with chants of "Where's Roger? - clap clap, clapclapclap" from 7:00 Friday until 11 PM Sunday, folks ought to think about turning in their tickets.
Posted by Michael at 08:34 AM | Comments (0)
April 18, 2007
Red Sox Lookalikes and Popeye Jones
Dan at Bugs & Cranks has found some separated at birth pictures of current Red Sox. The Ortiz one might be the funniest S.A.B. picture I've seen since the side-by-side comparison of Popeye Jones and Nosferatu.
Interesting sidelight: This appeared on the Popeye Jones page:
FREE ALERTS: Get the latest Popeye Jones news emailed to you.
Sign up for Popeye Jones email alerts? I think picking up a discarded scratch ticket from the pile in front of Store 24 has a better chance of paying off than being on the Popeye Jones Breaking News email list.
Posted by Michael at 08:43 AM | Comments (0)
March 29, 2007
Daisuke Can Win Games All By Himself
Dan Shaughnessy gave us something to look forward to yesterday:
The result of all this [what 'this' is isn't worth getting excited about; trust me] will be a five-day frenzy of Dice-K speculation on two continents. Is he hurt? Is he frustrated? Is he a diva? Is he physically and mentally prepared for his first big league start next Friday in Kansas City?
The problem with this is that the rest of the Red Sox are scheduled to be in Arlington, Texas, on Friday.
Will Daisuke be traded to Detroit by next week? (I used the Internet to check the Royals' schedule, but then again I'm a basement-dwelling loser who uses the Internet to look stuff up, and not some hotshot sportswriter.) Or is he planning to beat Kansas City all by himself? Is the Japanese concept of ronin, the masterless samurai, still alive and well?
Or did Shaughnessy just eff up?
Posted by Michael at 09:46 AM | Comments (4)
March 23, 2007
You Provide the Content: Baseball Music
So Jon and I have decided we need to start a letter-writing campaign to make Soul Coughing's "Super Bon Bon" the official song they play at Fenway when Papelbon comes in from the bullpen.
So I'll throw this out to the panel: what's your walk-up song? What do you want to hear the PA blaring when you come up to bat or out of the 'pen?
I'll throw a few of mine out: "The Mountain Song" by Jane's Addiction; "Waiting Room" by Fugazi; "Lounge Fly" by Stone Temple Pilots (even if it was used for MTV News); or "Go" by Pearl Jam.
Your turn; maybe we can at least come up with something to help David Wright.
Posted by Michael at 10:50 AM | Comments (3)
March 13, 2007
That Word Does Not Mean What You Think It Means
It doesn't really bother me that much that Ben Affleck is making a DVD aimed at teaching babies to be Red Sox fans. Whatever keeps Sum of All Fears II out of theaters, after all.
But don't give me this:
New dad Affleck, a Boston, Massachusetts native, is a die-hard Red Sox fan.
Die-hard? That explains why we always see him in the crowd at games against the Orioles and Devil Rays.
Donnie Wahlberg...there's a diehard fan. Every year he's at the Celtics-Clippers game in LA, he often flies up to Sacramento when the C's are there, and he'll join Mike and Tommy in the booth and talk intelligently and knowledgeably about the franchise.
Affleck sits in the front row of Sox-Yankee games with his starlet du jour, and once showed up in the booth and ripped Lou Merloni.
As George Carlin (as the hippie) said when Homer Simpsons dared Chief Wiggum to smash the hippies' heads open...this man does not represent us.
Posted by Michael at 01:41 PM | Comments (0)
February 12, 2007
Truck Amuck
Want your Red Sox equipment truck in photographic form?
How about a video (note: the truck was cranking AC/DC; check your volume before you play it)?
Posted by Michael at 08:25 PM | Comments (1)
The Truck
In the category of "ridiculous annual events", the day the equipment truck leaves Boston for Spring Training in Fort Myers has to be on the list somewhere. So there I was.
It was cool - everyone in the crowd seemed to have the same "this is silly, but whatever" looks on their faces as I did. About ten minutes to 1, a truck pulled up with Wally and some assorted people, blaring music (Want to guess which songs? Did you guess "Dirty Water", "Tessie", and "Sweet Caroline"? Very good). They threw little Nerf baseballs everywhere (I got 2).
The funniest thing is that the cops didn't close off Van Ness Street while the final preparations were being made, so delivery trucks and cars kept going by. One poor reporter tried to do a piece from the middle of the street and had to keep getting out of the way.
Pictures (and a video?) when I get home.
Posted by Michael at 01:35 PM | Comments (2)